37 Super Jokes About Eating
Why are sad people silent at a Mexican restaurant?
They probably don't want to taco bout it.
What happened to the clock that was still hungry?
It went back four seconds.
What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?
Make me one with everything.
Why does a Moon-rock taste better than an Earth-rock?
Because it's a little meteor.
Why did two 4s skip dinner?
Because they already 8.
Did you hear about the man who implanted a chip in his body to stop hunger?
In fact, he implanted a whole bag of chips.
Why did the teddy bear stop eating?
He was stuffed.
What can you put into the world's most delicious piece of cake in order to make it even better?
Your teeth.
Why is it impossible to starve in the desert?
Because of all the sand which is there.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 8 9.
What did the leopard say to the chef after dinner?
He said, "That really hit the spots."
Why won't your friends share the cheese at a Mexican restauarant?
It's nacho cheese.
What does a Thesaurus eat for breakfast?
A synonym roll.
What's green and tastes like a chocolate chip cookie?
A chocolate chip cookie. The green part was a lie.
Why did 7 eat 9?
7 likes 3 square meals.
Why don't you tell jokes about pizza?
They’re too cheesy.
Why shouldn’t you eat clocks?
It can be very time consuming.
What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?
Some kids don't like to eat broccoli.
What sickness is caused by eating Christmas trees?
Tinselitis.
What do you call a train that eats too much?
A chew-chew train.
What's it called when the bottom half of a fraction is made out of cake?
A de-nom-nom-nom-inator.
Why did the woman delay her diet plans?
She had too much on her plate right now.
Where did the chemist sometimes have his lunch?
On a periodic table.
Why is the dieting advice to “eat light” so dangerous?
That’s how you become a black hole.
What do trees put on salad?
Branch dressing.
Why is dropping a thanksgiving meal like an international incident?
It includes the fall of Turkey, the breakup of China, and Hungary people in revolt.
What do you call it when you're too hungry to sleep?
Insom-nom-nom-nom-nia.
What was Sherlock Holmes’ favorite supper?
Mystery meat.
What did the Maki say to the Nigiri?
Wasabi!
What happens when you eat too many Navy beans?
You end up with a dishonorable discharge.
What do PHD students eat when they're hungry?
Academia nuts.
Do zombies eat with their fingers?
No, they eat their fingers separately.
What is a zombie's favorite part of dinner?
When they rise from the gravy.
What will happen if you swallow a book of synonyms?
You'll get thesaurus throat you ever had.
How do you know if your family can't count calories?
You probably have the figures to prove it.
What should you do if people make you sick?
Cook them longer.
What kind of lunch meat goes into your boots?
Below knee.