How often should you tell jokes about basic elements?
Periodically.
Why did she quit her job at the helium factory?
She simply refused to be spoken to in that tone of voice.
What did everyone say when Oxygen and Magnesium got married?
They were like, OMg!
Why do you need to carry radioactive materials in sealed, lead containers?
Because you don't want anything to fall out.
What do you call a bunch of iron atoms at a carnival?
A ferrous wheel.
What’s a pirate’s favorite element?
Aaaaargon.
How do geologists ask each other out?
They say, “Are you a carbon sample? Because I’d love to date you.”
What's another name for the Periodic Table of elements?
The atoms family.
When do you stop telling chemistry jokes?
When all the good ones argon.
Are there any good jokes about sodium?
Na.
What do batman and 16 atoms of sodium have in common?
Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
What do you do with a sick chemist?
If you can’t helium and you can’t curium, you may have to barium.
What do you call a chemist with fake breasts dressed as a clown in jail?
Silicon.
Why is helium addiction such a problem?
Nobody takes your cries for help seriously.
Why are helium, curium, and barium the three main medical elements?
If you can't curium or helium, you barium.
Why did the science kid recite the alphabet as A B C D E F G water P Q R S T U V W X Y Z.
Because he heard water was H2O.
What do you do when you're out of chemistry jokes?
If the jokes really argon, just zinc of a new one.
Why was one element refusing to speak to the other element?
He was mad atom.