Did you hear about the satellite dishes who got married?
The ceremony was dull, but the reception was amazing.
What did the flowers do when the bride walked down the aisle?
They rose.
Why did the melons have a big wedding ceremony?
Because they cantaloupe.
What did the two pieces of bread say on their wedding day?
It was loaf at first sight.
Who cares if you sing really loud and really bad in a shower?
The bride and all her guests, apparently.
Why don't people have weddings in the winter?
They're worried about someone getting cold feet.
What did everyone say when Oxygen and Magnesium got married?
They were like, OMg!
How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?
It gave her a ring.
What does a spider bride wear?
A webbing dress.