How much does it cost a pirate to get his ears pierced?
A buck an ear.
Why didn't the pirate shower before he had to walk the plank?
He knew he'd be washing up on shore later.
Why do pirates wear an eye patch?
Because there is only one I in pirate.
What did the pirate say when he turned 80?
Aye matey.
Why don't pirates take a shower before walking the plank?
There's no point. They'll just wash up on shore.
Why didn't the pirates go to the scary movie?
It was rated RRRRRR.
Where do pirates get their hooks?
Second-hand stores.
What's a pirate's favorite letter?
You might think it's R but his first love will always be the C.
What's the difference between a normal pirate and a sexy pirate?
Depends on their booty.
What’s a pirate’s favorite element?
Aaaaargon.
What do pirates wear in the winter?
Long Johns Silver.
What do you call a pirate with two eyes and two legs?
A rookie.
What do you call a pirate who likes to skip school?
Captain Hooky.
Why do pirates make great singers?
Because they always hit the high C.
Did you hear about the quantum pirate?
He'll make you walk the Planck.