What’s the difference between Boba Fett and a time machine operated by Marty McFly?
One’s a Mandalorian, and the other’s a manned DeLorean.
How many ears does Captain Kirk have?
Three: a left ear, a right ear, and a final front ear.
How does Darth Vader like his toast?
On the dark side.
What Jedi is the best with Photoshop?
Adobe Wan Kenobi
Why are robots never afraid?
They have nerves of steel.
Why couldn’t Luke Skywalker find love?
He was looking in Alderaan places.
What Star Wars character swears the most?
R2-D2. They have to bleep out every word he says.
Why did Star Wars movies 4, 5, and 6 come before 1, 2, and 3?
Because in charge of directing, Yoda was.
Why doesn't Yoda lend money?
He's a little short.
How do Tusken Raiders cheat on their taxes?
They always single file, to hide their numbers.
Did you hear about the sale at the Darth Maul?
Everything was half off.
How does Wicket get around Endor?
Ewoks wherever he goes.
Did you hear about Han Solo's barbeque?
The meat was chewy.
What’s the internal temperature of a Tauntaun?
Lukewarm.
Did you hear about the girl who got a face tattoo of her favorite Star Wars character?
You should’ve seen the Luke on her face.
What do you call a scared young Jedi?
Panickin' Skywalker.
What do the starship Enterprise and toilet paper have in common
They both circle Uranus looking for Klingons.
How did the scientist respond when his assistant said that the did not understand the alien cloning machine?
That makes two of us.
Why don't Imperial Stormtroopers play blackjack?
They can't hit anything.
What did Robocop say to Schrodinger's cat?
Dead or alive, you're coming with me.
Why was General Yoda afraid of April?
Because March, April May.
Why don’t the Jedi have a Navy?
Because a life at sea is a path to the dock side.
How is the Force like duct tape?
It has a light side and a dark side and it binds the universe together.
Why was Star Wars released in the order of episode 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3, 7, 8, 9?
In charge of the order, Yoda was.
Why isn't C3PO made out of glass?
Because then he'd be C through PO.
Why is Captain Kirk's greatest enemy so dangerous?
Whenever he's on screen, there are Khan sequences.
What did Obi Wan say to Luke Skywalker when they ran out of clean spoons?
Use the forks, Luke.
When is it best to attack Superman's home world?
Krypton night.
Because he's got such little legs.
How does Kylo Ren spend father's day?
Solo.
How come Yoda didn't make it as an archeologist?
He insisted there was no "Tri"certatops.
What kind of car does Luke Skywalker drive?
A Toy-Yoda.