How do they figure out the price of hammers?
Per pound.
What’s the most groundbreaking invention of all time?
The shovel.
How do some people cut a piece of wood just by looking at it?
I don’t know, but they swear they saw it with their own eyes.
Why did the painter always prefer his step ladder?
He never really knew his real ladder.
Did you hear about that new book about adhesives?
I bet you can't put it down.
What tool do mathematicians use most?
Multi-pliers.
Did you hear about the king who was exactly 12 inches tall?
He became known as a great ruler.
What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?
A can't opener.
Did you hear about the guy convicted of killing another man with sandpaper?
He only intended to rough him up a bit.
How is the Force like duct tape?
It has a light side and a dark side and it binds the universe together.
What did they do before the invention of the crowbar?
The just drank in the nest.