What did the traffic light say to the car?
Don’t look! I’m about to change.
Why did the best taxi driver get fired?
He was always going the extra mile.
Did you hear about the square that got into a car accident?
Now he’s a rect-angle.
Why do stoplights turn red?
You might turn a little red too, if you had to change in the middle of the street.
What happens when a strawberry gets hit by a car?
Traffic jam.
What's the last thing that goes through a bug's mind when he hits the windshield of a car?
His backside.
How come you don't park on frog road?
Your car might be toad.
What do you do when you're afraid of a speed bump?
You slowly get over it.
What do you say to a hitchhiker with one leg?
Hop in.
Did you hear about the wooden car with the wooden engine?
It wooden go.
What do you do when you see a space man?
Park your car, man.
How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.
What's worse than a two hour commute to get to work?
The eight hour wait to go home.
Why did the car get a flat tire?
Because there was a fork in the road.
Did you hear about the guy who froze at the drive-in?
He went to see "Closed for the Winter".
What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make?
Brrrroooom, brrroooom.
Why did dad take his pick-up truck onto the golf course?
He heard it was a driving range.
Why was the computer late for work?
It's a hard drive.
Why do race car drivers take a break during a race?
When they're getting tired.
What kind of car does Frankenstein drive?
A monster truck.
Did you hear about the college professor who was involved in a car wreck?
He was grading papers on a curve.
What did the ghost say to his passengers when they got in the car?
Buckle your sheet belts, everyone.
What kind of car does Luke Skywalker drive?
A Toy-Yoda.
What do you have to know about heading into San Francisco over the Golden Gate?
Just cross that bridge when you come to it.