Long Jokes
The Admiral was resting in his quarters when suddenly the lookout burst in.

"Two enemy ships spotted on the horizon, sir!"

"Right," said the Admiral, "Fetch me my red shirt."

The danger passed but later in the day the lookout burst in once more.

"Three enemy ships spotted on the horizon, sir."

"Right," said the admiral, leaping to his feet, "Fetch me my red shirt, lad."

This time, when the danger passed, the lookout felt compelled to ask the Admiral why he always ordered his red shirt when the threat of battle arose.

"Well," explained the Admiral, "It's a question of morale. If I'm wounded while wearing a red shirt, the men won't see the blood and will continue to fight."

The next morning, the Admiral was resting in his quarters as usual when suddenly the lookout burst in.

"Twelve enemy ships are closing in fast, sir!"

"Right," said the Admiral, "Fetch me my brown pants."